Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Credit card is eternal!

Cancel your credit card before you die.........  (hilarious! )

This is so priceless.

A lady died this past January, and the Bank billed her for February and March for their
annual service charges on her credit card, and added late fees and interest on the monthly charge.

The balance had been Rs.0.00 when she died, but now somewhere around Rs.6000.
A family member placed a call to the Bank.Here is the exchange :

Family Member: 'I am calling to tell you she died back in January.'

Bank: 'The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply.'

Family Member: 'Maybe, you should turn it over to collections. '

Bank: 'Since it is two months past due, it already has been.'

Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?'

Bank: 'Either report her account to frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!'

Family Member: 'Do you think God will be mad at her?'

Bank: 'Excuse me?'

Family Member: 'Did you just get what I was telling you - the part about her being dead?'

Bank: 'Sir, you'll have to speak to my supervisor.'
Supervisor gets on the phone.

Family Member: 'I'm calling to tell you, she died back in January with a Rs.0 balance.'

Bank: 'The account was never closed and late fees and charges still apply.'

Family Member: 'You mean you want to collect from her estate?'

Bank: (Stammer) 'Are you her lawyer?'

Family Member: 'No, I'm her great nephew.' (Lawyer info was given)

Bank: 'Could you fax us a certificate of death?'

Family Member: 'Sure.' (Fax number was given )

After they got the fax :
Bank: 'Our system just isn't setup for death. I don't know what more I can do to help.'

Family Member: 'Well, if you figure it out, great! If not, you could just keep billing her. She won't care.'

Bank: 'Well, the late fees and charges will still apply.'
(What is wrong with these people?!?)

Family Member: 'Would you like her new billing address?'

Bank: 'That might help...'

Family Member: Odessa Memorial Cemetery , Avinashi, Coimbatore

Bank: 'Sir, that's a cemetery!'

Family Member: 'And what do you do with dead people on your planet???'

Source:  Whatsapp group


Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Kudos!

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peter's Square.
The first Catholic man tells his friends,
 "My son is a priest. When he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
 The second Catholic man chirps,
 "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'." 

 The third Catholic gent says,
 "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room everyone bows their head and says 'Your Eminence'."

 The fourth Catholic man says very proudly,
 "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

 Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?" 

 She proudly replies,
 "I have a daughter, 

 SLIM

 TALL

 36"

 24"

 36"

 When she walks into a room, people say,

 "Jeeeeesssssus!".

Source:  Internet

Thursday, April 20, 2017

Wives are magicians...!

The woman who invented the phrase ...
"All men are the same", was a Chinese woman who lost her husband in a crowd.

There are 3 kinds of men in this world.
Some remain single and make wonders happen. 
Some have girlfriends and see wonders happen.
Rest get married and wonder what happened....

Wives are magicians........
They can change anything into an argument.

Women live a Better, Longer and Peaceful Life, as compared to men.
WHY? 
A very INTELLIGENT man replied: 
Women don't have a wife!


Source:  Internet